as i have spent some sleepless nights hanging out with my baby boy, i've found some time to read sparkly green earrings, which is a book i would absolutely recommend. it will make you laugh and cry; sometimes at the same time. melanie says in her memoir:
"...then there's motherhood. Even if we've dreamed of having babies on our own, there is nothing that prepares us for the way that moment cracks open our hearts and pours in the type of pure love we never knew existed. A love that isn't about us but is just about wanting to love and protect this little, helpless person who will emit all manner of bodily fluids on us if given half the chance. You can't fathom it until you experience it. You can decorate a nursery, scribble down baby names, and feel the miracle of a foot kicking your bladder, but none of that comes close to capturing the true moments that make a mama. That's why I believe motherhood gives us the first true glimpse of how God loves us. The kind of love that's irrevocable, unrelenting, unconditional. I think its the closest humans get to living out 1 Corinthians 13. Motherhood is a Holy Communion with Goldfish crackers and juice boxes" (p.209).
the adventure of motherhood is the best thing ever.
the week before hudson arrived was a little chaotic and filled with a lot of joy, anticipation, excitement, and lack of sleep...
my sister-in-law and brother went into the hospital on 1/26/13 because amy was having contractions. she was 31 weeks pregnant with the twins and we all began to pray that the magnesium would stop her contractions in order to allow those little precious boys to get a little bigger. however, God answered our prayers in a different way and amy delivered Gideon and Max on 1/27/13 at around 5:00a.m.
they are beautiful boys who are already living up to their name and are being warriors. God is good.
during that saturday i ended up in triage with contractions. i was only dilated to a 2 so they monitored me for a little bit and sent me home. we were back a few hours later when amy went into labor so needless to say it felt like we camped out at willow creek that weekend. then again on tuesday i had intense contractions that had lasted for a long time so we ended up in triage again. i was sent home again and encouraged to rest, hydrate, and eat well.
wednesday i saw my doctor, paige partridge and had progressed to a 3. we scheduled an induction for 2/4/13 because hudson was measuring big and she just encouraged me that we were close. after two rounds of false alarms and being exhausted i had resolved that hudson would arrive on monday.
saturday morning we went to ricks to get breakfast for my family and to head over to nathan and amy's. my parents were coming into town because MK and Dru were in town from dallas to celebrate the twin's birth and were hoping to catch the arrival of hudson. i told them they were wishful thinkers because i did not think he would come until monday. we were all going to spend the day together. we hung out at nate and amy's that morning; i was having contractions and kept thinking, "i bet this will be what the next 36 hours is like before i am induced". we all went to lunch at jason's deli and then the crew decided to go to the mall for a little bit. i was feeling worse and worse. i told aaron we needed to head home but was hesitant to tell him about the contractions because of how the week had gone. i thought he would think i was crazy. we got home and i ended up on our big brown chair crying through the contractions. we waited 2 hours and i finally told him, "we have to go!"
we got to willow creek at 4:30 and dr. terry saw me immediately. he is wonderful and a dear friend as well as my doctor, paige. they checked me and i was at a 4 so they admitted me. back labor was so bad that i decided to get an epidural and that was a really, really good decision.
back labor was the absolute worst part of the whole labor process for me.
the next 7 hours were uneventful. i stayed at a 4. friends and family came to visit. i tried to sleep. then at 1:15 a.m. my nurse came in and i was magically at a 7. then 15 minutes later hudson's heart rate dropped a little bit and she came back in and checked me and i was at a 10. after that, dr. terry came in and talked me through what to expect. paige had a party that night so i was totally okay with dr. terry delivering me, but then as i was talking with him, paige walks in the room and i literally yelped with joy. stacy furlow came in a few minutes later and we were ready to roll. these three people are some of my heroes and i cannot adequately express how thankful i am for each of them and the role they played in hudson's birth.
having all those people in the room was absolutely the greatest thing for me. they were so encouraging and my husband was unbelievably awesome during the delivery. having gone from a 4 to 10 in a matter of 30 minutes was a whirlwind and then i pushed for about 15 minutes before hudson was here. he was born at 2:20 a.m. he came out squeaking a little bit and was absolutely adorable from first sight. he weighed 8 lbs. 8oz. and was 21.5 inches long. his hair is blonde and he has the sweetest eyes. the arrival of hudson was an absolutely incredible experience. i wouldn't say it was easy, but i will say it was beautiful. it surpassed every expectation i had. seeing his face for the first time was seeing a prayer that i've prayed for so long be answered in the most miarcalous way. i still don't know how to process it all.
the back story of the last 8 years for me involves lots of surgeries, the removal of my right ovary, and a million questions about if and how i would get to be a mother. within the last year i have gotten married, pregnant, and i am now a mom. to say that God gave me the desires of my heart is an absolute understatement. time and again, the Lord has reminded me to let Him write the story and to quit trying to control everything. i'm a really slow learner.
hudson is the cutest little boy and stole my heart the minute i saw him. he is loved by so many and i cannot wait to see how God grows him. it is my prayer that i will be the mother that hudson needs. i want to love him, show him Jesus, encourage him, and be his biggest fan. aaron is an amazing father and i am more in love with him as i watch him be a daddy. we are loving our new family and are overwhelmed with gratitude to the One who gave us this little boy. i can honestly say the adventure of motherhood is my favorite thing.
p.s. thanks to my dear friend, blanca for capturing hudson's birth! huddy is so thankful for his wonka and so are we! :)
2 comments:
CRYING.
God is good!!!!!!!
Hudson is just precious!
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