do not fear.

most of the last month has been lived with a great deal of anxiety and fear. i haven't wanted the constant companion, but it is here. so many questions about where i'll get a job. will i get into a Ph.D program? recovering from another surgery that resulted in a miracle revealing God's healing in my life & in turn a reminder that He has a plan for me; better than i could have ever imagined.

so along with learning who God is and who He is not. i have begun a journey of what it means when God commanded, "do not fear." looking back at the times in scripture when that was commanded, it is evident that is was commanded before or during a time when God was about to do something big.

God said "do not fear" to Moses before he began the journey into the wilderness.

the result the people were led out of the wilderness into the promise land (obviously with a few years in between due to fear)

to joshua he said, "do not fear" and commanded that they march around the city 7 times.

the result: the battle of jericho was won.

when the angel came to Mary & Joseph, "do not fear" when they were told of the child growing within the virgin.

the result our Savior was born.

and over & over again.

in fact if you look at hebrews 11, it is clear that the men & women that are attributed with hearts of faithfulness & obedience to our God, they had numerous reasons they could have, maybe even should have feared.

abraham could have feared that God would go back on his promise of allowing the descendents to come through Isaac thus producing an unwillingness to watch God provide another sacrifice.

rahab could have succumb to the fear of being caught for hiding the spies or could have allowed her shame to paralyze her from acting.

over and over again in scripture we see men & women who took God seriously when he said, "do not fear" and they trusted him.

because of their faith, "they toppled kingdoms, made justice work, took the promises for themselves, shut the mouths of lions, were protected from fires & swords, turned disadvantage to advantage, won battles, routed alien armies. women received their loved ones back from the dead. there were those who under torture, refused to give in and go free, preferring something better: resurrection. others braved abuse and whips, and yes, chains and dungeons. we have stories of those who were stoned, sawed in two, murdered in cold blood, stories of vagrants wandering the earth in animal skins, homeless, friendless, powerless--the world didn't deserve them! making their way as best the could on cruel edges of the world. not one of these people, even though their lives of faith were exemplary, got their hands on what was promised. God had a better plan for us: that their faith and our faith would come together to make one completed whole, their lives of faith not complete apart for ours."

i read that and i think what am i missing out on because i have chosen fear instead of faith?

God has commanded "do not fear" and what am i missing out on because i find him untrustworthy? i see my desires and i see my circumstances and i wonder, can the mouths of lions really be shut for me? will He provide a way to win this battle? does He know who He has called and what my story is?

they believed. i should believe. and we will receive what was promised.

beauty for ashes.

faith for fear.

can you believe it?

i want to.