it should be noted that i didn't just press snooze one too many times; i all together didn't hear my alarm or it just didn't go off. but i awoke at approximately 8:45 maybe 8:46. whatever the time it didn't really matter because i was late no matter how you sliced it. i was supposed to be at JBU at 9:00 to speak at the orientation for the new graduate counseling students. i live approximately 25 miles from school. you don't have to be a mathematician to determine just how late i was. so i did what i've done a few other times in my life and threw my hair in a pony tail, brushed my teeth while grabbing a diet coke & nutri-grain bar while i'm buttoning my blouse & putting on a few much needed accessories. i multi-task like it is my job. if only it could be.
off i went to JBU, to arrive with a few moments to spare before i shared about graduate christian fellowship. my heart was beating fast and i was tired. possibly because i had only been awake for 35 minutes and possibly from all the rushing around that i did. but none the less, the graduate students were introduced to GCF & i hope they don't judge it based on my poor attempt to articulate the ministry half-awake. time will tell.
friday morning began in a rush & i just let it continue until 11:11 the time written on my warning given by the arkansas highway patrol officer. you see, i was still in a hurry on my way home from orientation thus decided that i would set my cruise at too fast of a speed for the posted speed limit. apparently those signs aren't mere suggestions.
he clocked me going 81 in a 65. that would have been one expensive ticket.
i cried out of frustration.
the officer was really nice & told me it would be okay.
i thanked him, took my blue ticket that indicated only a warning, and breathed deeply.
something happened in my soul as i pulled back onto the road.
i thought about why i'm in such a hurry.
i didn't have an answer, but i did have a few excuses.
i have lived my summer with post-it notes of lists of things to accomplish and a day planner with days already filled before they arrive. it's exhausting even thinking about how i allowed myself to live.
so i'm slowing down, really quickly.
this weekend, i spent time with my family. played bag-go with my brothers, made waffles for the boys and shot a basketball with them. i went for a walk & talked on the phone with my best friend. i saw a movie & went to the lake. i quit thinking so much about myself & thought about what i could do for other people. i prayed & thanked God for His relentless pursuit. i laughed & laughed some more.
i drove to JBU this morning at a speed of approximately 67m.p.h, still 2 over the speed limit, but better none the less. my ipod played some of my favorite music that might just be considered flawless. i met a friend @ cafe on broadway where we drank coffee and prayed together. i talked to a few friends on the sidewalk before getting in my car. i wasn't in a hurry.
as i walked into my office this morning i thought about why i felt different and i think it's because i finally slowed down a little bit. i saw the world & the people around me a little differently.
i think it's the start of something good.
because i'm learning to slow down and...
love better.
embrace more.
laugh all the time.
serve & meet needs.
really listen to my friends.
have a grateful heart.
hopefully i'll learn it all quickly ;)
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